Rip-off News round-up. Our pick of the last week's media (Thu 13th September)

Health and safety inspections cut in regulation curb

Plans to exempt thousands of businesses from health and safety inspections are to be announced by ministers. "We have identified the red tape and now we are going to cut it," said Business Minister Michael Fallon. BBC NEWS
(Mr Fallon was speaking whilst standing under a poorly secured 500kg chandelier. Held up only by a piece of red coloured tape. Which someone promptly cut.)

Planning rules on building extensions to be relaxed 'to boost economy'

The government wants to get planning officers "off people's backs." But the Local Government Association says such red tape is a "myth." It released figures showing a backlog of 400,000 prospective homes which have planning permission but have not yet been built. BBC NEWS

HMRC's special tax unit nets extra £500m from Britain's richest

The High Net Worth Unit has investigated 5,000 of the wealthiest taxpayers, each with assets exceeding £20m, and exceeded its collection targets. The unit achieved this with only 380 staff. GUARDIAN
("It's so profitable we're going to outsource this unit to the private sector," said the Minister for Outsourcing Everything Profitable to the Private Sector)

Blair snaps up a nifty million bucks brokering Glencore's new 'take it or leave it' £22.5bn bid for Xstrata

After an 11th hour intervention from Tony Blair that earned him £625,000, the long-running saga of the Glencore-Xstrata mining merger looked to be entering its final chapter. DAILY MAIL

Thousands set to lose out as drugs giant Glaxo slashes pension benefits for its UK workforce

The drugs giant becomes the latest in a long line of blue-chip businesses to take a knife to company pensions.  Unions asked the government what their policy was to cope with this "race to the bottom" for pension provisions. DAILY MAIL
("Take two aspirin? That's as far as we've got," said our government insider)

Workers borrow more than £300 a month

The amount employees are borrowing to get through the month had risen sharply from £127 to £327 pounds since March. TELEGRAPH

US tax authorities award $104m (£65m) to UBS employee for exposing bank's massive tax dodge

Bradley Birkenfeld rewarded for being the whistleblower in a major tax evasion case against UBS, the Swiss bank. Yet Birkenfeld  had been jailed for conspiring to defraud the US after admitting to assisting a wealthy American real estate mogul conceal $200m (£121m) from the IRS in offshore accounts. TELEGRAPH

(So... a thieving banker is released from jail and given $104m for finally telling the truth. THERE IS NO GOD.)

Business secretary Vince Cable dismisses right wing claims that further business deregulation is the key to growth
Cable rejects looser "fire at will" employment laws. He said consultation showed minimal business support for the idea, adding that greater job insecurity was undesirable at a time of low consumer confidence. But he recommends the removal of a chunk of health and safety legislation. GUARDIAN

Flagship aircraft carrier HMS Ark Royal will be sold as scrap for £3m

The ship was decommissioned 5 years early to help tackle a multi-billion pound defence deficit. Attempts to sell it to developers as a helipad, casino, or other, have failed. BBC NEWS

Divorce settlements should be worked out according to a mathematical formula 

Formula would divide up a couple’s assets depending on income and how long they have been married, a major review has suggested. Using the formula can provide clarity and satisfy both partners, before it all ends up in court. "But it doesn't mean, come the divorce, if you've done nothing you'll get nothing". TELEGRAPH

("Phew!" said the junior partner in our coalition government.)

Ofqual 'ordered late changes to GCSE English grade boundaries'

Letters leaked to the Times Educational Supplement show exams regulator Ofqual ordered exam board Edexcel to make changes beyond what "might normally be required". As a consequence, the same mark that got a student a C in January got a student a D this summer. BBC NEWS

(Moving the goal posts AFTER thousands of balls have been kicked into the back of the net takes some doing.)